What to Do When Your Parents Don’t Support Your Dreams

We all probably have at least one dream that seems pretty crazy, like there’s no way we could achieve it, or that we’re crazy to assume that we can do it. I want to tell you to not give up on that crazy, out-of-this-world dream of yours. Because, who knows what might happen as you try to achieve that dream?! As I will be starting my last year of college come August, I have been thinking a lot about what I will want to do after I graduate. Where do I want to live, what do I want to do for a living, how do I want a typical day in my life to go? It’s stressful, guys.

What do I want to do? Well, I’m not totally sure, but I would love to work for myself and have the flexibility to pursue multiple different things. As soothing as a routine can be, I would love a career where each day is a little bit different. That way, there’s no monotony to make me crave Fridays and groan over Mondays.

My parents? They’re a little less sure about me working for myself. I still love them, and they still love me, but they don’t really understand why I would want to be an online business owner or what I would do…especially when it comes to health insurance and retirement plans. Don’t get me wrong, those plans are great to have in place, but to me, they’re not worth taking a job which makes me unhappy.

So, what should you do if your parents aren’t supportive of your dreams? Read on, friends.

EDUCATE YOURSELF.

It’s important to learn all that you can about what your dream job, school, or life will entail. How much does it cost? How much can you make? What are the hours like? These questions and many more are good things to ask when considering a specific career or school choice. You want to learn all of this so that you can know, with as much certainty as you can, that this is the choice for you. That way you can…

EDUCATE YOUR PARENTS.

It might take a little bit of effort on your part to actually talk to your parents when you already know that they’re not exactly enthusiastic about your dreams, but it’s necessary. Tell your parents everything that you have learned about what it means to follow your dream. You can either sit down and have a talk all at once, write a letter, or even break it up into little chunks as you go about researching everything yourself.

When you go to talk to your parents, be sure to tell them everything. Not only will they appreciate how dedicated you are to this dream, they will also probably want to do some research themselves. If you leave out the bad stuff (you know, the lack of health insurance, or the location that you might have to live in to do your dream job), they will find that out. If you tell them upfront, you can defend yourself and tell them how you will get by.

Taking the health insurance example, research prices for health packages in your country or state (if you aren’t lucky enough to live in a country with universal health care, that is). See what the prices are, and determine how you will pay for that. If you don’t make a ton of money, you might qualify for some assistance. Check with your state or city.

MAKE A PLAN.

There can often be a lot of costs associated with pursuing your dreams. Write up a plan with a budget, all costs, how you will fill those costs, and what you plan to do if it doesn’t work out at first. Will you get a part time job? Work odd jobs? Think about this, and then report back to your parents. They will see you as even more serious about your dream.

ACCEPT THAT YOU CAN’T CHANGE PEOPLE.

If your parents are still weary about your dream, that’s okay. You have done a lot to try and convince them or lessen their worries, and it didn’t work. That doesn’t mean you should give up or look for something else. You might have to work a little harder if they are unwilling to financially support you, but if it is what you really want, it will be worth it.

DO WHAT YOU CAN TO PURSUE YOUR DREAMS.

Your dreams are important. You have probably invested a lot of time into working on your dream, whether that is practicing your instrument or writing. That time shouldn’t be wasted in order to please someone else. If you really want to do something else, that’s one thing. If you do something for your parents or friends, you won’t be as happy as if you did the thing that you want to do.

I hope you found these tips helpful. Your dreams are worth it, and you are worth it. Don’t try and change yourself to fit the mold of anyone else. If your dreams seem a little crazy or unrealistic, that’s okay!

What is your crazy dream and how did your parents react when you first told them about it?

Let me know in the comments or on Twitter at @HannahHaefele, and be sure to check out my blog at www.killerharmony.com!