Think about a person who makes you feel really great when you are around them. What do they do that makes you feel so good? Likely, they probably do some of these things!
Use their name often.
People love to hear their name. It feels good to know that someone knows their name and who they you. It makes them feel known, loved and acknowledged.
Dale Carnegie says this about how important one’s name is:
Remember that a person’s name is, to that person, the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
One’s name is an essential part of their identity. Don’t just use it to get someone’s attention, but use it to boost their self-confidence and make them feel amazing about themselves!
Give them a compliment on something other than their appearance.
It’s rare to receive a comment about something other than one’s appearance. Unfortunately, appearance is one of the first things that we notice about someone. When you take the time to compliment someone’s personality, kindness or actions, it shows that you pay attention to them on a deeper level.The next time you want to give someone a compliment, try one of these:
- You are so important to me.
- You are great at…
- You make me feel happy when I’m around you.
- I love the way that you…
Related: Five Things Every Woman Needs to Hear
Look them in the eyes.
Stare into their soul. Okay, not in a creepy way, but it really does make a difference! The eyes are the window to the soul, after all.
Psychology Today talks about the connection between eye contact and positive feelings:
“There is more mutual eye contact between friends than others, and a looker’s frank gaze is widely interpreted as positive regard. Lovers really do gaze more into each other’s eyes.”
When someone is sharing something important to them, look them in the eyes. When you say hello, look them in the eyes. After you give them a hug, look them in the eye.
Looking someone in the eyes can make them feel cared for and listened to. When having a conversation with someone, don’t look at your phone, glance around the room or keep checking your watch. Stay in the moment. It really makes all the difference.
Ask them for advice.
People have their own special and unique talents and gifts. Take the time to call that out by asking the people in your life for advice or help with something that they are good at.
For example, if you have a question about how to code something on your blog, ask your tech-savvy friend to help you. If you are having a relationship problem, ask your married friend to give you some advice. If you want to learn how to knit, ask your aunt who knits you a scarf every year for Christmas.
Not only is this helpful for you, but it makes those in your life feel great about themselves. Let their gifts and talents shine!
Visiting from Dare to Share Saturday – love it! I have people tell me on a regular basis what a good mom I am, at first it felt weird, but it really does make me feel better so I think that is a great compliment for moms. It’s not like we hear it often otherwise. Eye contact is so important, I am trying to teach my 2-year-old that now.
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Yes, I really think that eye contact is something that should be taught from a young age!
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What a motivating post! I am obsessed with your positive energy. This is going to sound so funny, but my FAVORITE COMPLIMENTS have been metaphors or personality/style doppelgangers, like, “You are exactly like Rory Gilmore” or “You remind me of Zooey Deschanel’s character on NEW GIRL.” It makes me feel smart, quirky, stylish, and cute! You’re absolutely right, it’s so much better than traditional aesthetic compliments that do not have a permanent place in my mind. I loved reading this post and I am excited for your next one! Keep going girl, you’ve got chops!
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YES. Those compliments are the best! The unique compliments are always the ones that stick!
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I have a really hard time maintaining eye contact, I have to work on that one. Thanks for posting. Hello from Motivation Monday.
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It’s so important, but it’s so hard! Thanks for stopping by!
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Good advice, Thank you for joining the Small victories Sunday linkup. Please join again. Pinned to the group board.
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Great article. I found that all of these really help when dealing with people, even “difficult” ones.
Stopping by from Small Victories Linkup, have a great day!
Alex – Funky Jungle
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Thanks for reading!
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what a lovely positive post!x
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Fab post. I’m going to make more of an effort to use names and to compliment other things rather than just appearances. I’m so bad for remembering every criticism I ever received but forgetting compliments.
#twinklytuesday
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It’s so true that we always remember negative things rather than positive things.
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I have the same problem!
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What an inspiring post! Thanks for sharing this useful advice. My mummy is sure to take this onboard xx #TwinklyTuesday x
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My husband always tells me I’m a good mum, but I know he’s a better dad than I am a mum so I dont really accept it. However, he does love my cooking 😉 #twinklytuesday
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Accepting compliments is just as important as giving them 🙂
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This is such a lovely post and such an important thing to talk about. Luckily I have a lot of great people in my life and its so important to let people know they are appreciated! #TwinklyTuesday
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I couldn’t agree more!
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I absolutely love everything about this post! Especially complimenting on something other than appearance. #TwinklyTuesday
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Thank you for stopping by!
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These are such great tips!!! I love this post. I’m going to try this from now on with every person I know and see from now on. I’ve just discovered your blog and I love it. I’m off to read some more posts. I’ve seen quite a few in the side bar that sound great! xx #twinklytuesday
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Thanks for visiting and looking around!
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I think my best compliment so far is when a complete stranger tells me that Zach is a lovely little thing. It always means so much to me 🙂 this is a great post – I am definitely going to put my phone down next time the other half is trying to talk to me! Thanks so much for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday
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Putting down your phone when talking to someone is a great way to make them feel loved.
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This is so true and effective! Thanks for sharing and will be back to read some more! #TwinklyTuesday
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